Cheating and divorce statistics are some of the ugliest and most feared numbers you will find on the Internet. One in five marriages face infidelity and almost half of all marriages end in divorce. You’re probably asking yourself: what’s the good news? The good news is that over half of all marriages work even though monogamy, according to the latest scientific studies, is completely unnatural, and only 17% of the marriages affected by infidelity end because of it.
Probably not what you wanted to hear, right?
You probably wanted to hear that the rate of infidelity is declining and that the divorce rate is going with it. Well, the latter is true. The divorce rate is at its lowest since 1970 and couples are proving that they are taking it seriously and in it for the long haul. However, the rate of infidelity has not changed much in the time that it has been studied. Approximately 45% of married women will cheat during a long marriage and 60% of married men will. For the married couples: don’t feel as though you are in this alone. One in 2.7 of all couples are affected by infidelity.
You are probably hoping right about now that the cheating and divorce statistics have to have a silver lining. It depends upon the perspective what you would consider a good statistic when it comes to these matters. Ten percent of all infidelities last only a day, half last more than a month, while an insignificant few make it past the “four year” mark (probably poor consolation to many marriages). How about it the fact that it is astronomically rare for the cheater to actually marry the person they cheated with? And for those that actually do they have a higher than average (above 75%) divorce rate. Some people like that one.
Given the cheating and divorce statistics it is a wonder anyone tries their hand at marriage at all.
Hope is a human trait. We hope that this will not happen to us. We hope that our marriage will survive adversity. We hope our spouse will not stray. We hope that if they stray they will come back to us. We hope these things even when the odds are against us. Hope is a powerful thing.
Still, as hope is human so is the propensity for infidelity. Humans mess up. It can be the end of a marriage or, with counseling, a new beginning depending upon how you choose to react to it. Do you throw the baby out with the bath water? Do you do this knowing that most of your neighbors are quietly in the same boat? It is a personal decision how one deal with infidelity. It is definitely a heart and spirit crusher. You feel lost, lied to, and in limbo. You are afraid it will happen again. It just might even if you are with someone new. This doesn’t have to be depressing. Armed with the facts of how and why it happens you can put armor on your marriage or relationship. Knowing where cheating starts, knowing how to prevent and survive it, these are your best defenses.